


Let it Bleed

by Teamdeadwill



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Letters, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-05
Updated: 2015-02-05
Packaged: 2018-03-10 14:28:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3293789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Teamdeadwill/pseuds/Teamdeadwill
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Red is a lovely colour, isn't it?</p><p>Not when coming back from war.<br/>Not when your best friend, your lover, has left you.<br/>Not when it's your red.</p><p>Just a short series of letters from Cas to Dean back in the 1960's</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let it Bleed

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Twist and Shout](https://archiveofourown.org/works/537876) by [gabriel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gabriel/pseuds/gabriel), [standbyme](https://archiveofourown.org/users/standbyme/pseuds/standbyme). 



**July 1968**    
  


_Dean,_

_Our song played at the diner today. And it hurt. I haven’t seen you in three months and god do I miss you. Your smile, your laugh, your voice trailing through the streets as you cry out how you just wanted somebody to love, even though Mrs. Damon would just stare at you through her old, rickety house._

_Three months buddy; it’s been three months since you left. And I really don’t know what to do anymore. You were always there- you were like a brother to me you arrogant dick._

~~_I think your personality has rubbed off on me, thanks_ ~~

_I promise I’ll see you soon, okay?_

_Cas._

* * *

**September 1968**   
  


 

_Dean,_

_You never answered my question back in April: What was it like? I know it’s a touchy subject, but I just thought that you had some kind of epiphany while you were off in Vietnam; you were different when you got back. And you still owe me five bucks from out bet against who’d sing first. Of course I would get drunk and sing on a bar at 2am… idiot._

_Your friend,_

_Cas._

* * *

**December 1968**   
  


 

_MERRY CHRISTMAS DEAN!_

_This year was marvelous; Sam got me that new biology textbook I needed, and Meg gave me a fruitcake, and Bobby even slipped me a couple of notes in a Christmas card! How nice of him, right? I never really got to know him that well (obviously he thought of you as another son so…) but he seems really kind and caring. He’s going to be my History teacher down at the College too!  
_

_Oh Dean, if only you were home to have such a wonderful Christmas with us; I wish you’d come back sooner.  
_

_Your Cas._  

* * *

**January 24th, 1969**   
  


_HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAN!!!_

_~~Love~~ Cas_

* * *

**May 1969**   
  


_Dean, you’re scaring me._

_It’s been over a year and you haven’t come home. Granted our home isn’t much- just a ratty old apartment in a back alleyway with barely any furniture- but it’s still home. Have you been out looking for somewhere else? You promised me that you’d see me again soon. Well soon has come and gone Dean, and I’m concerned._

_Bobby came over a few weeks back- gave me a pie (your favourite, Apple) and looked really sad. I don’t know why, but he seemed down about something. Oh no, was that the anniversary of Karen’s passing? Crap, I’ve gotta go cheer him up._

_Please respond this time. Please._

_Cas._

* * *

**July 20th, 1969**   
  


_Deany,_

_Did you watch the Moon Landing? Wasn’t it inspirational! I would have loved to major in physics, but I doubt they’d accept me. You could have a chance if you studied up hard enough! Dean, I could always help you out with that if needed; you know I soak up everything I’m taught. Just give me a few days with some research material and I’ll be fine._

_On another note, you still haven’t responded. Aren’t my letters coming through? Or have you just given up on reading again? YOU NEED TO LEARN DEAN!!! READING IS HELPFUL._

_Please respond Dean, I miss you._

_Your Cas._

* * *

**October 1969**

_  
Dean,_

_I give up writing to you. You’re being such a prick and I just can’t be bothered writing if you’re never gonna respond._

_Come home, please! We all miss you. I miss you._

_Love, Cas._

* * *

**August 1970**   
  


_Oh. I see now. It’s all so clear, why you’ve left. I’m sorry Dean, I should have been there._

* * *

**February 1971**   
  


_Dean, I’m sorry about everything. I know it was hard for you but… I can’t okay? I can’t keep going on pretending like you’re coming home. I look out the window every night expecting you to walk up to the apartment block, come inside, comfort me and just be there. But that’s never happening, is it? I… I’m sorry. Cas._

* * *

**March 1972**   
  


_It’s cold Dean. It’s cold here without you. Why did you leave me?_

* * *

**April 1973**   
  


_Five years Dean._

_Five years since you left. Five years since I lost you forever. Five years since my world came crumbling down because of you._

_The war is still on. You made no mark on it. Two years over there, two years back, five years since you left once again._ _I still cry every night. I never leave home. I barely eat and I can’t sleep._

_All because of you._

_Dean, I’ve always loved you and I always will, but I can’t keep going on like this. Why did you… why?_

* * *

**November 1973**   
  


_The red seems nice, doesn’t it?  
  
_ _Red is like anger, red is like a fierce storm on a cold night._  
Red is the fire that glows oh so bright.   
Red creates a new perspective on life.   
Red is so much different than white.   
Red gives me hope; it gives me a chance.   
Red lets me fly into your warm, graceful hands.   
Red is a key to a new world on the mend.   
Red sees my days come to an end.   
So as I move from white to red,   
My body and soul can finally rest.   
The pills and the rope can do me no harm,   
For the Red overtakes, leads me to a friend.

_Goodbye Dean_

**Author's Note:**

> This was actually for a school project. We were told to "impress our teacher", and so I did. I got an A+ for this and was advised to put this up online, so why not fanfic it? 
> 
> Luckily she didn't know anything about Destiel... hehehe
> 
> Kudos to you readers <3


End file.
